I love the freedom to appreciate the belongings in my life, but not feel like I have to keep them forever. My biggest relationships don't last my whole life, why should I expect this blender to stay with me until I die? It has really helped my guilt about donating things I purchased. I like Christine's practice vs. perfection reframe. Some of the "temptation" language feels a little diet-y, but I also know I can choose which parts of practicing minimalism feel good and leave behind the ones that feel restrictive.
I loooved this episode. Being a Brazilian person living in Florida for the past two years, it has been hard not to fall into buying everything cute from target or home goods, every month because over here you guys celebrate something every single month. I have always been really into Christmas so in Brazil I have always had a tree and something for the table, like a Christmas centerpiece. Brazilians are really not big in doing major Christmas decorations, and we definitely do not decorate for any other time of the year because it’s expensive. But when I came here I went all out like: Christmas blankets! Christmas hand towels! Christmas tea towels! Which honestly I do not regret those buys and I absolutely love having a house that looks like Santa threw up in, BUT, at some point I was like: “should I do this for Valentine’s Day? For autumn? For summer? Ohhh I have to have Halloween stuff. Everything is so cheap if I buy just after the holiday ends.” But if I do, where do I keep all of this stuff that clearly I’m gonna use for only a month out of each year? I live in a small apartment, I barely have space to store all the Christmas stuff I bought. So that made me rethink. I’m a big fan of American culture, I love how you guys celebrate everything, but honestly, that definitely fuels the need for stuff. I am in a “no buy January” challenge that I decided to do this month and I thought it was gonna be super easy but it’s so hard not to fall for all these sales and discounts emails I have been getting. So I feel like it’s much harder to not buy stuff living here than when I lived there, because the amount of cute stuff, discount offers and target TikTok accounts just make it a lot harder to resist the buying impulse. So how can people be minimalistic if they are bombarded by so many opportunities to buy everyday? It’s very hard. Anyway, my 2 cents! Thanks for this awesome newsletter.
This conversation was so interesting I listened twice! I too covet the perfect capsule wordrobe and linen sheets in the sunlight. I'm curious how all this ties into decision fatigue. When it comes to clothes or skin care, or a comfy couch, or what to make for dinner just want the one thing I need and I want to love it and I don't want anything else. I think I romanticize minimalism is because it feels there is less chaos around decisions. Obviously it's all an illusion, but it's a pretty convincing illusion
Ohhh yes, I can see that. The one place I can often pull of a kind of temporary minimalism is with my closet because I'll do these big clear-outs and then LOVE how few decisions I have to make to get dressed. But inevitably, every season it falls apart when some of those items stop fitting/wear out/just stop working for whatever reason... I'm with you on wanting less chaos around decisions though!
Virginia, if you still need to donate the AG stuff there’s a place in White Plains called “Girl Again” that is an AG resale shop that takes donations. It was started by a woman with an autistic daughter as a place for autistic girls and women to work and learn different skills. They clean up the dolls, merchandise them, run AG classes (like make a tshirt for your doll, etc), etc etc. https://girlagain.com/
We painted our bedroom green years ago, and now I wish it were a more neutral color, but I clearly don’t care enough to actually paint it. My daughter’s room is a gray blue so we did pick a somewhat neutral color for her (she does have lavender curtains and a lot of pink decor in her room including multiple signs with her name). I like minimalism as an aesthetic- I think that neutrals are beautiful, but they’re just not practical for our daily lives. My daughter keeps most of her stuff confined to her room, but it’s an ongoing battle to keep all her things from getting all over the house. She (like us) likes her things to be generally tidy and has a sense of where she thinks things “should” go, but it hasn’t stopped her from trying to put all her stuff in her bedroom floor at times and then complaining it’s too messy and she needs help to fix it.
I always feel I struggle in the Minimalist stakes because it does have a whiff of diet culture, my body changes/I do take up space, and I do love colours and patterns but Christine’s reframe of practice vs aesthetics is SO reassuring.
Sara, does your gold standard pillow stay cool (I run warm in bed)?
And Virginia, I’m a fan of colour in bedrooms – my blackout curtains are a lively purple linen (that I’ve never lined dried).
I have been thinking about this episode since I listened to it. We were stuck inside this entire week thanks to a frigid snow storm followed by an ice storm (in the PNW...not our normal). Anyway, my youngest has about a million figures and was gifted with an LOL mansion and buckets full of dolls and accessories for her last birthday. It’s a nightmare to clean up. I enacted the speech Christine provided about understanding that it must feel really hard to follow through with cleaning up when there’s nowhere to put things. And you know? It worked! I stopped holding on to things and both kids got on board cleaning out stuffies, clothes, toys, art supplies....I have a giant pile (unfortunately in my bedroom) to donate and get to the second hand store (we’re lucky to have a great second hand toy store at the mall of all places).
And asking them to clean up has been so much easier because there’s actually a place for them to put their stuff. My older daughter (8) commented that sometimes she’d get frustrated when she was asked to clean up because she didn’t know where to put things. Which led to my husband threatening to throw it away which led to tears and/or fighting. It’s early on but this is a game changer for sure.
I have historically been pretty good at minimalism (or at least purging and keeping stuff that I use / love). Then, my size changed seemingly constantly with two pregnancies followed by a slow release of diet culture. It’s been a journey finding the sweet spot of prioritizing myself and making sure I have clothes that feel good in whatever size I’m in, vs prioritizing conscious consumerism + minimalism. While I realize these don’t have to be at odds, they very much feel at odds.
YES. I truly think the kind of minimalism we get sold re: clothes requires thin privilege and/or an investment in diet culture. It's a kind of restriction and not a particularly helpful one.
Also have you seen the Ab Fab episode where Edina is frantically cleaning her house and removing half the stuff from it bc an old friend of hers from who is so chic and minimalist is coming over? And the friend finally arrived and turns out she is a new mom and a total mess and brings and dumps all her baby gear everywhere etc etc. anyway it’s great lol
Tiny point but am v interested in the way that line drying is positioned in American culture, as like an old fashioned, simple life, virtuous-beyond-sense thing.
I’m a New Zealander with pakeha English parents and for the vast majority of people in my circles it’s just... how you dry your washing? Yes, I check the weather forecast before I do a load, and yes, I have a dryer but it mostly gets used in the very depths of winter. I like hanging the washing out because I get to be outside and often hiding from my kids for minutes at a time!
Oh this is a great point and an excellent example of how American capitalism likes to co-opt totally functional (and timeless!) care tasks and sell them back to us (the Americans) as this aspirational ideal!
I want to recommend Kimberly Clark's ongoing Youtube series How To Stop Shopping In 5 Easy Steps. I've been disappointed in myself over the past year with how much I've been buying (mostly clothes), and hope to cut way back this year. It's been helpful to have podcasts like this too, thanks for the great content!
I love the freedom to appreciate the belongings in my life, but not feel like I have to keep them forever. My biggest relationships don't last my whole life, why should I expect this blender to stay with me until I die? It has really helped my guilt about donating things I purchased. I like Christine's practice vs. perfection reframe. Some of the "temptation" language feels a little diet-y, but I also know I can choose which parts of practicing minimalism feel good and leave behind the ones that feel restrictive.
YES!
Ahaha EXCELLENT POINT about relationships.
I loooved this episode. Being a Brazilian person living in Florida for the past two years, it has been hard not to fall into buying everything cute from target or home goods, every month because over here you guys celebrate something every single month. I have always been really into Christmas so in Brazil I have always had a tree and something for the table, like a Christmas centerpiece. Brazilians are really not big in doing major Christmas decorations, and we definitely do not decorate for any other time of the year because it’s expensive. But when I came here I went all out like: Christmas blankets! Christmas hand towels! Christmas tea towels! Which honestly I do not regret those buys and I absolutely love having a house that looks like Santa threw up in, BUT, at some point I was like: “should I do this for Valentine’s Day? For autumn? For summer? Ohhh I have to have Halloween stuff. Everything is so cheap if I buy just after the holiday ends.” But if I do, where do I keep all of this stuff that clearly I’m gonna use for only a month out of each year? I live in a small apartment, I barely have space to store all the Christmas stuff I bought. So that made me rethink. I’m a big fan of American culture, I love how you guys celebrate everything, but honestly, that definitely fuels the need for stuff. I am in a “no buy January” challenge that I decided to do this month and I thought it was gonna be super easy but it’s so hard not to fall for all these sales and discounts emails I have been getting. So I feel like it’s much harder to not buy stuff living here than when I lived there, because the amount of cute stuff, discount offers and target TikTok accounts just make it a lot harder to resist the buying impulse. So how can people be minimalistic if they are bombarded by so many opportunities to buy everyday? It’s very hard. Anyway, my 2 cents! Thanks for this awesome newsletter.
The section of Target that features (CHEAP) seasonal homegoods stuff is like - an entire THING. I love the idea of a no-buy January!
This lead image! The staircase that ends in midair is just terrifying in its banality.
Ahaha right! We were going through all sorts of dumb Getty stock "minimalist" images and then I was like THE STAIRCASE GOES NOWHERE, boom.
This conversation was so interesting I listened twice! I too covet the perfect capsule wordrobe and linen sheets in the sunlight. I'm curious how all this ties into decision fatigue. When it comes to clothes or skin care, or a comfy couch, or what to make for dinner just want the one thing I need and I want to love it and I don't want anything else. I think I romanticize minimalism is because it feels there is less chaos around decisions. Obviously it's all an illusion, but it's a pretty convincing illusion
100% - I think this is the other reasons I adore recs from trusted sources - the peace of having someone just TELL ME WHAT TO DO/BUY.
Ohhh yes, I can see that. The one place I can often pull of a kind of temporary minimalism is with my closet because I'll do these big clear-outs and then LOVE how few decisions I have to make to get dressed. But inevitably, every season it falls apart when some of those items stop fitting/wear out/just stop working for whatever reason... I'm with you on wanting less chaos around decisions though!
Virginia, if you still need to donate the AG stuff there’s a place in White Plains called “Girl Again” that is an AG resale shop that takes donations. It was started by a woman with an autistic daughter as a place for autistic girls and women to work and learn different skills. They clean up the dolls, merchandise them, run AG classes (like make a tshirt for your doll, etc), etc etc. https://girlagain.com/
Ohhh so excited to check this out, thank you!
Thanks for this intel!
The idea of being able to abandon pressure or responsibility by abandoning your stuff -- this is the thrill of hotel rooms!!
OMG YES
I do have a lot of cute laundry accessories tho in environmentally friendly stainless steel 😵💫
Nothing wrong with cute shit!
We painted our bedroom green years ago, and now I wish it were a more neutral color, but I clearly don’t care enough to actually paint it. My daughter’s room is a gray blue so we did pick a somewhat neutral color for her (she does have lavender curtains and a lot of pink decor in her room including multiple signs with her name). I like minimalism as an aesthetic- I think that neutrals are beautiful, but they’re just not practical for our daily lives. My daughter keeps most of her stuff confined to her room, but it’s an ongoing battle to keep all her things from getting all over the house. She (like us) likes her things to be generally tidy and has a sense of where she thinks things “should” go, but it hasn’t stopped her from trying to put all her stuff in her bedroom floor at times and then complaining it’s too messy and she needs help to fix it.
I always feel I struggle in the Minimalist stakes because it does have a whiff of diet culture, my body changes/I do take up space, and I do love colours and patterns but Christine’s reframe of practice vs aesthetics is SO reassuring.
Sara, does your gold standard pillow stay cool (I run warm in bed)?
And Virginia, I’m a fan of colour in bedrooms – my blackout curtains are a lively purple linen (that I’ve never lined dried).
Also ADORE Christine's reframe. Whew. Yay purple curtains!!
Oh my gosh yes yes yes it stays so nice and cool! One of my fave qualities.
I have been thinking about this episode since I listened to it. We were stuck inside this entire week thanks to a frigid snow storm followed by an ice storm (in the PNW...not our normal). Anyway, my youngest has about a million figures and was gifted with an LOL mansion and buckets full of dolls and accessories for her last birthday. It’s a nightmare to clean up. I enacted the speech Christine provided about understanding that it must feel really hard to follow through with cleaning up when there’s nowhere to put things. And you know? It worked! I stopped holding on to things and both kids got on board cleaning out stuffies, clothes, toys, art supplies....I have a giant pile (unfortunately in my bedroom) to donate and get to the second hand store (we’re lucky to have a great second hand toy store at the mall of all places).
And asking them to clean up has been so much easier because there’s actually a place for them to put their stuff. My older daughter (8) commented that sometimes she’d get frustrated when she was asked to clean up because she didn’t know where to put things. Which led to my husband threatening to throw it away which led to tears and/or fighting. It’s early on but this is a game changer for sure.
Thank you for saying SO MANY things I’ve felt and thought and never articulated. I related to this SO much.
I have historically been pretty good at minimalism (or at least purging and keeping stuff that I use / love). Then, my size changed seemingly constantly with two pregnancies followed by a slow release of diet culture. It’s been a journey finding the sweet spot of prioritizing myself and making sure I have clothes that feel good in whatever size I’m in, vs prioritizing conscious consumerism + minimalism. While I realize these don’t have to be at odds, they very much feel at odds.
YES. I truly think the kind of minimalism we get sold re: clothes requires thin privilege and/or an investment in diet culture. It's a kind of restriction and not a particularly helpful one.
Oh wow, very cool!!
Also have you seen the Ab Fab episode where Edina is frantically cleaning her house and removing half the stuff from it bc an old friend of hers from who is so chic and minimalist is coming over? And the friend finally arrived and turns out she is a new mom and a total mess and brings and dumps all her baby gear everywhere etc etc. anyway it’s great lol
Tiny point but am v interested in the way that line drying is positioned in American culture, as like an old fashioned, simple life, virtuous-beyond-sense thing.
I’m a New Zealander with pakeha English parents and for the vast majority of people in my circles it’s just... how you dry your washing? Yes, I check the weather forecast before I do a load, and yes, I have a dryer but it mostly gets used in the very depths of winter. I like hanging the washing out because I get to be outside and often hiding from my kids for minutes at a time!
Oh this is a great point and an excellent example of how American capitalism likes to co-opt totally functional (and timeless!) care tasks and sell them back to us (the Americans) as this aspirational ideal!
I want to recommend Kimberly Clark's ongoing Youtube series How To Stop Shopping In 5 Easy Steps. I've been disappointed in myself over the past year with how much I've been buying (mostly clothes), and hope to cut way back this year. It's been helpful to have podcasts like this too, thanks for the great content!
I both desperately need that YouTube series and want nothing to do with that YouTube series.😂
lol SAME